Welcome to Issue 38 of The Elegance Edit – your weekly guide to body language, elegance, and timeless style. Each edition offers thoughtful insights to help you feel more poised, confident, and graceful in every part of your life.

In this newsletter, we will not be discussing single ladies, but women who have already built a family and found their life partner, yet…

JULY 30 - The Elegance of a Leader
JULY 31 - The Elegance of a First Lady
AUGUST 1 - Presence Mastery

FULL TRANSFORMATION in one weekend

My dear ladies, all of my content comes from your real stories and your real questions. And today I want to share one I hear far too often. 💔

One of my students recently asked me:

"After eight years of marriage, my husband barely looks at me anymore. We argue more. I am tired of trying to understand what he needs. I have tried the lingerie. I have tried to be sexy but I do not feel it working. I have tried to be vulnerable. And yet nothing changes."

What she described as the lingerie, the vulnerability, the endless trying are all beautiful gestures. But they are gestures. And gestures without presence behind them fade quickly.

What is truly important is first understanding who you are. Working not only on the externals - which are still important, but also on how you move through a room. The energy you carry before you say a word. The mystery. The art of flirtation and please, do not confuse this with being overly seductive or sexy. Flirting is something far more subtle: it is the art that invites lightness, unpredictability, and a certain je ne sais quoi that keeps people wanting to know more about you.

And last but not least your femininity. The one that some of us lose after daily routines take over and then yes, the lingerie, the vulnerability they become the cherry on top.

This is not something you do once to impress. This is something you work on consistently and it is important to maintain whether you have been married for eight years or eight days.

Unless, of course, you are perfectly happy having a roommate. 😉🤍

Movement as Communication

I believe there are 4 different types of body language and 4 different walks - 8 in total. Let us start with Body Language:

Business Body Language - the one you use when you want to be perceived as authoritative, professional, and confident.

Elegant Body Language - your everyday movement. The gestures we often talk about - how to hold your bag, how to sit, how to adjust your glasses. It carries a natural energy while still highlighting your elegance and grace in every movement.

Romantic Body Language - these movements are reserved only for your favorite person. They are different from Business Body Language because they showcase your softness, your mystery, and your feminine confidence.

Casual Body Language - what we often use with family or at casual events like sports gatherings. However, what I notice in my students is that once you learn Elegant Body Language, you remain elegant even in casual settings whether you are wearing sweatpants or jeans.

And then — the walks:

1. Business Walk - this walk supports and serves as the foundation of your Business Body Language. It helps you look more confident, own the room and reinforces the authoritative and professional energy you want to project.

2. Feminine Walk - the walk for galas, celebrations, and date nights. This is the walk that helps you appear magnetic, elegant, sensual and graceful.

3. Modeling Walk - this is a stage walk. We exaggerate the steps, bend the knee, and amplify the arm movement. Smiling is optional and depends entirely on the designer. This is not an everyday walk.

4. Pageant Walk - this walk is characterized by exaggerated hip movement, shoulder rolls, and overtly flirtatious energy on stage. This is not the walk for attending events with your husband to meet his partners, investors or for organizing a charity event.

I know that may sound like a lot, but once you understand the difference between these walks and body language styles, you will feel significantly more confident. Because you will know that you are the one strategizing your movements and you will know the effect each walk creates.

In marriage, we tend to lean heavily on Casual Body Language, simply because we become so comfortable with the person beside us. We remove our heels. We prioritize ease over intention.

Or we default to Business Body Language, because it works so well in our careers. The intentionality, the straightforwardness, getting straight to the point. And with all of that, we function on autopilot.

Your femininity, the very energy that helped create your connection in the first place, quietly gets set aside as if it is no longer necessary. Sometimes after the wedding or after three, five, ten, years of marriage.

But as you are here - I've got you, my dear lady. Here are 3 tips I would like to share with you within this newsletter. 🤍

The Magnetic Gaze

One of the most powerful elements of Feminine Presence - which we also teach in our Glow Up and Elegance Refinement Mentorship - is what we call the "Magnetic Gaze." It is the art of awakening warmth in your eyes and using your gaze as your most powerful tool.

In marriage, this skill becomes deeply intimate. The eye contact that can command a room can also create a profound connection with your partner. But only if you still use it correctly.

Some ladies stop making real eye contact with their husbands over the years. The gaze becomes distracted, habitual or simply absent.

Feminine Strategy: Next time you see your husband whether he walks through the door, sits down at dinner, or simply turns to speak to you pause for two full seconds before responding. Hold his gaze, soften your eyes and let him feel that he has your complete presence. The combination of a pause and steady, warm eye contact will create a moment of flirtation and playfulness that no words could ever replace. 

This eye contact creates mystery because it is never quite predictable. Adding a smile to this combination signals warmth and invitation. But if held without a smile it sends a signal of mystery, and sparks a question in his mind.

What is there I have not yet discovered in her? 🤍

Choose Your Walk

As you have already read in this newsletter - your walk type depends on the context, and the movement of your body will be different in each situation.

It is important to understand the context you are in. At work, maintain a more reserved walk minimal hip movement, minimal shoulder movement. This is your Executive Presence.

But the moment you close your laptop and leave work behind I truly encourage you to let go of your Executive Presence persona. Slow down your walk. Allow your hips to move. Allow your shoulders to soften always with appropriateness to the situation, of course.

For a romantic dinner, you can allow yourself to show more. For gatherings with friends or family, show a little less but it should still feel noticeably softer and more feminine than your business walk.

Feminine Strategy: Work on the fluidity of your body, especially your hips and shoulders, as these signal warmth, softness, and magnetism. Consider enrolling in a dance class to help you develop these movements. Or you are always welcome to join our Online Course Walk in Heels where I have deconstructed every movement and explained both the Business and Feminine Walk in greater detail, so you can master them and make the room pause when you walk in. 🤍

The Henley Royal Regatta transforms the Thames into Britain's most prestigious rowing event, where tradition, social hierarchy, and athletic excellence converge in ways that reveal far more about British culture than any guidebook could teach. 

Taking place July 1-5, 2026, this legendary event demonstrates something we don't discuss enough: attending or understanding global cultural events isn't about checking boxes on a bucket list – it's about developing the kind of cultural fluency that makes you genuinely interesting in conversation.

That conversational depth is what separates women who travel and see things from women who actually engage with the world. When you understand Henley you can discuss it intelligently with anyone from that world. And that intellectual engagement makes you more interesting, more respected, and frankly, more attractive as a conversational partner, whether you intend to visit Henley or not.

The woman who can move between understanding global events, who reads about traditions before experiencing them, who approaches cultural engagement with genuine curiosity rather than passive tourism – she's the woman who enriches every room she enters. July 1-5, 2026

henleyregatta.co.uk

Practical Elegance in Marriage

So what does this actually look like, translating Glow Up principles into a marriage where mystery and intrigue are sustained?

Continue to dress with intention.

Often we believe only what we wear outside matters. But think about what truly separates married women who maintain their refined presence from those who slowly disappear into comfort. It is what you choose to wear at home, in the quiet moments when only your husband sees you.

Think of your at-home outfits as a continuation of your feminine self. This could be a mix of silk robes, elegant trousers and beautiful t-shirts, lovely cotton dresses, or modal pajamas. Incredibly soft and luxurious against the skin, draping beautifully without being clingy or revealing. It feels expensive, and it feels good which means you will actually want to wear it.

And just as important, let go of the clothes you no longer want to wear outside, that have quietly become your "home clothes" by default. Your at-home wardrobe deserves the same intention as the one the world sees.