The Elegance Edit - Issue 3

Olga’s Note
Dear Ladies,

Welcome to Issue 3 of The Elegance Edit — your weekly guide to body language, elegance, and timeless style. Each edition offers thoughtful insights to help you feel more poised, confident, and graceful in every part of your life.

Last week, we explored how to balance femininity in professional settings. This week, we shift from boardrooms to more intimate spaces, focusing on how to express Romantic Interest in a way that feels true to you—warm, sincere, and elegantly understated.

Secrets Unfold
The Secret Art of Elegant Flirting

Through my classes and countless conversations with women, I’ve often heard

“When I go on dates, I don’t quite know how to behave. I want to show interest without seeming promiscuous. I want to remain elegant and graceful.”

Often, what happens instead is that these women—confident and successful in their careers—bring their professional, masculine energy to the table. Traits like directness and control serve them well in business, but feel misaligned in romantic settings. They want to feel feminine—without being misunderstood.

This is why I felt it was time to explore a deeply feminine art: interacting with a gentleman. Let’s call it Elegant Flirting.

Backed by Science: The Power of Ambiguity

As always, I ground my teachings in both lived experience and research. A fascinating study from McMaster University (Tisdale & Sheldon, 2018) found that the core of effective flirting lies in strategic ambiguity—a delicate balance that invites curiosity and allows room for discovery. Not too obvious, not too obscure.

And my dear ladies, this truly is a million-dollar secret. Because what holds many women back is fear—fear of rejection, fear of being misunderstood, or fear of not being in control and flirting is a game that you must learn to enjoy playing.

Today, let’s explore some of the research and body language techniques that can help you navigate these moments with confidence, warmth, and grace.

What Truly Attracts?

Before we dive into specific gestures, remember: your presence matters more than any pose. Research by Regan, Levin, Sprecher, Christopher & Cate (2000) Journal of Psychology & Human Sexuality . found that:

– Short-term interest is primarily linked to physical attractiveness.
– Long-term interest is more deeply connected to qualities like intelligence, honesty, and warmth.

So yes, how you move and carry yourself on a first date does matter—but what builds meaningful relationships is your essence and your authenticity.

The Flirting Cues Men Notice Most According to Tisdale & Sheldon (2018):

• Smiling and eye contact were rated as the most attractive flirting behaviors by male focus groups. These cues radiate openness and warmth without feeling forced.

• Timid flirting was generally preferred over boldness, which was seen as fun but potentially overwhelming.

• Media, especially romantic comedies, influences our perception of flirtation—highlighting the importance of mindful modeling, as supported by social learning theory.

A study led by A. Chang (2021) at McMaster University found that high-groove music—such as soul, jazz, or funk—enhanced the desire to see a partner again, likely by uplifting mood and fostering emotional openness.

Tip: When planning your first date, avoid loud, distracting music. Instead, opt for something gentle—live music, jazz, or soul. It will help you relax—and your gentleman will too.

References: 
1. Female Flirting Cues and Male Perception by Latoya Tisdale & Pavica Sheldon, 2018.
2. Body sway predicts romantic interest in speed dating by Andrew Chang, Haley E. Kragness et al., 2018.
3.What Characteristics Do Men and Women Desire In Their Short-Term Sexual and Long-Term Romantic Partners? Regan et al, 2008.

Take it further
Join Me to Embody This Elegance

And to ensure your body movements are gentle, natural, and soft—let’s practice them before that important date arrives and the nerves set in.

For my ladies in New York:
I invite you to join me in person for Heels 1.0, where we’ll begin with postural alignment and the art of walking with elegance in both business and social settings.

Even more exciting—Romantic Body Language, a curated class where I teach 20 of the most effective nonverbal gestures to express romantic interest with poise and charm—never vulgar, always feminine.

For my ladies ONLINE:
We’ve just launched our 10-Day Online Marathon—a transformative series in graceful heels walking. Each day unlocks a new lesson building on the last. By day ten, your walk will radiate elegance, and you’ll begin to hear whispers like,

"Her walk is so elegant..."

But only you and I will know why and that will be our little secret. 😊

Upcoming Events
ONLINE

10 Days Online Heels Marathon
Walk in Heels like a Goddess

IN-PERSON NYC CLASS

HEELS & ROMANTIC BODY LANGUAGE All in-person classes in NYC schedule

Olga’s Tips
Elegance Tip of the week

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Olga’s Reccomendations
Dating Advice

The internet has no shortage of podcasts, TikToks and posts about how and who to date. This extensive podcast from Mel Robbins and Logan Ury, a behavior scientist and dating expert, has some easy-to-implement tips on dating – whether you’re a seasoned professional or entering the dating pool for the first time. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=166lDfHQtZA

Events
Lights, Camera, Conversation

Elegance thrives not only in how we act or dress, but also in the places we exist.

One such place is this cornerstone of New York’s cultural calendar which began as a symbol of resilience – built to revitalize the cultural scene of lower Manhattan following 9/11. Now this event celebrates storytelling through film, inviting filmmakers, producers, and creatives from around the world – and for the elegant woman, an opportunity to connect through a refined lens.

June 4-15 2025

https://tribecafilm.com

Game
The Elegance Game

In the following week, we will share the answer to this question. Click the answer that you think is right.