The Elegance Edit: Issue 17

Olga’s Note
Dear Ladies,

Welcome to Issue 17 of The Elegance Edit – your weekly guide to body language, elegance, and timeless style. Each edition offers thoughtful insights to help you feel more poised, confident, and graceful in every part of your life.

Until now, we’ve focused on you as the centre stage, now we’re flipping this idea. Have you ever been a plus one at an event, and had no idea how to introduce yourself, socialise or even converse? If so, we’ll be discussing this and more .

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October 24 - 25: Miami, FL
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FRIDAY, OCTOBER 17
12:30 - 2:30 PM: Social Etiquette
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The Elegant +1
Supporting Someone in the Spotlight

Standing beside someone who commands attention requires a particular kind of confidence. Whether you're accompanying your partner to their company's awards dinner or supporting a friend at their book launch or an important industry event, being an elegant plus-one is an art form that deserves thoughtful consideration.

The role appears deceptively simple: smile, look presentable, don't embarrass anyone. In reality, navigating these situations with grace requires understanding subtle social dynamics, reading rooms quickly, and knowing when to step forward and when to step back. It's a masterclass in elegance like no other.

The Psychology of Supporting Roles

There's a curious phenomenon that happens when accomplished people find themselves in supporting roles. The shift from being the primary player to the supporting cast member can create unexpected anxiety.

This discomfort often stems from unclear expectations. When you're the main event, the rules are straightforward: engage, lead conversations, work the room. As someone's plus-one, the boundaries feel less defined. When should you speak up? How do you introduce yourself without overshadowing your companion?

Understanding that these feelings are normal is the first step toward managing them gracefully. The most elegant plus-ones I've observed don't try to disappear entirely, nor do they compete for attention. They find that sweet spot where they remain genuinely present while allowing their companion to shine.

The Art of Strategic Visibility

Being an elegant plus-one requires what I call "strategic visibility." You want to be engaged and memorable for the right reasons, without pulling focus from the person you're supporting. This balance shows up in everything from how you dress to how you participate in conversations.

If your companion is receiving an award, your role is to beam with pride and share in their joy, not to network aggressively with other attendees. If you're at a business function where your friend is being honored, your gracious interactions with their colleagues reflect well on both of you.

This doesn't mean fading into the background. Engaged plus-ones ask thoughtful questions, contribute meaningfully to conversations when appropriate, and demonstrate genuine interest in the people they meet. They just do it all while keeping the spotlight properly focused.

Navigation Strategies for Social Uncertainty

The moment of introduction often creates the most anxiety for plus-ones. Do you wait for your companion to introduce you? Should you introduce yourself? What if they forget?

Allow your companion to lead introductions when possible, but be prepared to gracefully step in if needed. A simple "I don't think we've met, I'm Sarah" with a warm smile works in almost any situation. Keep your introduction brief and focus on connecting with the other person rather than reciting your accomplishments.

Pay attention to conversation dynamics. If someone asks about your work or background, answer genuinely but concisely, then redirect attention back to the person you're supporting or ask questions about the other person's connection to the event. This shows confidence without scene-stealing.

When you're unsure whether to extend your hand, err on the side of warmth. A handshake or friendly greeting rarely offends, while standing awkwardly without acknowledging someone often does.

The Elegant Exit Strategy

Sometimes the most graceful thing a plus-one can do is give their companion space. If your partner is deep in important business conversations, it's perfectly appropriate to excuse yourself briefly, visit the restroom, or step outside for fresh air. This gives them freedom to focus fully on important interactions without worrying about entertaining you.

Similarly, if you notice your companion needs to have private conversations, create space naturally. "I'm going to get another drink, can I bring you anything?" or "I want to check out that art display we noticed earlier" allows them room to maneuver while showing you're comfortable and confident on your own.

The Elegance Way

Being someone's plus-one doesn't mean suppressing your personality, that’s in fact the opposite of what to do. In fact, the most successful plus-ones often build their own relationships at these events, relationships that sometimes outlast or complement the original connection that brought them there.

The difference lies in approach. Instead of working the room like you're job hunting, focus on having genuine conversations with people who seem interesting. Ask about their involvement with the organization or event. Show curiosity about their work or interests. These authentic interactions often lead to more meaningful professional and personal connections than aggressive networking ever could.

Most importantly, being an elegant plus-one demonstrates something beautiful about character: the ability to genuinely celebrate others' achievements while maintaining your own sense of self-worth and dignity.

Embody the Elegance You Admire

True refinement is never accidental, it’s studied, practiced and cultivated with intention. That’s why I created the Elegance Refinement Mentorship.

This 8-week coaching program, led personally by Olga Kuznetcova, is for women who want to elevate the way they move, speak, lead, and express themselves in every room they enter to the highest level. Each session is taught by Olga and designed to help you embody quiet confidence in both professional and social life.

Enrollment for Cohort Two is finally open. If you're ready to refine every part of your elegance, apply below:

Olga’s Tips
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Olga’s Recommendations
Dressing the part

Your clothing choices as a plus-one send messages before you even speak. The goal is to look polished and appropriate without upstaging your companion or appearing to compete for attention. This requires understanding both the event's dress code and your role within it.

The perfect black cocktail dress remains the gold standard. A classic silhouette in quality fabric with minimal embellishment allows you to look sophisticated while ensuring the focus remains appropriately placed. The hemline should be no shorter than just above the knee, and necklines should be modest enough for professional settings. Pair it with understated jewelry, classic pumps, and a simple clutch. This one from MacDuggal would be perfect for professional events and cocktail parties alike.

Game
The Elegance Game

In the following week, we will share the answer to this question. Click the answer that you think is right.