The Elegance Edit: Issue 14

Olga’s Note
Dear Ladies,

Welcome to Issue 14 of The Elegance Edit – your weekly guide to body language, elegance, and timeless style. Each edition offers thoughtful insights to help you feel more poised, confident, and graceful in every part of your life.

Last week we covered how to express gratitude with grace. This week, we’ll discuss how to conduct yourself in social situations in the form of something many of us can struggle with – small talk. 

Talk the Talk
Small Talk with Substance

Most people treat small talk like a social tax – something to endure at networking events and cocktail parties rather than something to be enjoyed. What if those exchanges could become your secret weapon for building authentic relationships and leaving lasting impressions?

"How was your weekend?" "Fine, thanks. Yours?" "Good, good. Busy week ahead?”

We fill silence with empty words, check the social interaction box, and wonder why we feel disconnected despite being surrounded by people. 

Substantial small talk operates on curiosity rather than courtesy. For example, rather than commenting on the weather, notice something specific about your environment and invite them to share their perspective.

In last week's Elegance Game, we asked ‘what is the most refined approach to engaging in small talk at social gatherings?’ The answer is (C) ask open-ended questions that invite others to share their passions and experiences. This is the key to encourage sharing, and transform your small talk to an interaction to remember.

The Generosity of Focused Attention

Conversational substance comes from being genuinely interested in the person standing in front of you. This means putting away your phone, making appropriate eye contact, and resisting the urge to scan the room for more important people to talk to.

When someone mentions they just returned from a trip, don't just say "That's nice." Ask what surprised them most about the place, or what they'd recommend to a friend visiting for the first time. When they share that they're working on a new project, inquire about what drew them to it or what they're learning in the process.

Most people are so accustomed to surface-level interaction that genuine curiosity feels like a gift.

The Professional Advantage

Substantial small talk becomes particularly powerful in professional contexts. The colleague who asks about your latest project with genuine interest, rather than just making office noise, stands out. The conference attendee who inquires about what brought you to this particular event creates more memorable connections than someone who simply exchanges business cards.

These conversations often lead to unexpected opportunities because they're built on authentic interest rather than transactional networking. People remember feeling valued, and they tend to think of those who made them feel that way when opportunities arise.

Cultural Currency

One of the most effective ways to elevate small talk is developing what I call cultural currency – a reservoir of experiences, books, films, or ideas you can draw from naturally in conversation.

It means cultivating genuine interests that give you interesting things to discuss. The woman who can share her thoughts on a recent exhibition, recommend a fascinating podcast, or describe an unexpected insight from a book she's reading brings substance to even casual encounters.

This is why attending events like theater festivals, art exhibitions, or cultural performances serves a purpose beyond personal enjoyment – they provide you with the kind of rich experiences that make you an engaging conversationalist.

Beyond the Surface

The most elegant conversationalists understand that every interaction is an opportunity to learn something new about human nature, to discover unexpected connections, or to offer someone the gift of feeling heard and valued.

Share struggles and victories with equal grace. The woman who can laugh about her attempts to master sourdough baking or admit her complete confusion about cryptocurrency appears more relatable and interesting than someone who insists everything is perpetually wonderful.

The next time you find yourself in a situation that typically calls for small talk, remember that you have the power to create something more meaningful. Not through dramatic gestures or profound topics, but through the simple elegance of treating the person in front of you as someone worth knowing.

From Small Talk to Lasting Presence

Mastering small talk is more than learning conversational tricks—it’s about embodying a presence that draws people in. When you carry yourself with elegance, every word, gesture, and glance communicates something deeper: you are a woman worth remembering.

This is precisely what we cultivate in the Elegance Refinement Mentorship. Over eight weeks, we go beyond the surface skills—heels, etiquette, wardrobe, voice—and help you refine the way you are perceived.

✨ Imagine never again feeling invisible in a room.
✨ Imagine conversations that open doors instead of closing them.
✨ Imagine the quiet authority of walking, speaking, and being treated with respect, admiration, and warmth.

Small talk becomes magnetic when it flows from a woman who feels at ease in her own presence. And that’s what this mentorship is designed to give you—the confidence to walk into any space and be unforgettable.

If you’ve been following my weekly tips and applying them on your own, consider this program your next chapter—the space where everything you’ve been practicing comes together and transforms into your daily reality.

Click here to book your Elegance Call and discover if the September Cohort is for you.

This program isn’t for everyone. But if you’ve been longing to be seen, respected, and cherished—it might be exactly what you’ve been waiting for.

Upcoming Events
ELEGANCE REFINEMENT MENTORSHIP

8 weeks. 15 women. A lifetime of transformation.

This isn’t just about heels or etiquette—it’s about reclaiming your confidence, presence, and feminine glow. Through 14 live classes, you’ll master body language, social and professional etiquette, romantic gesture and femininity, social grace and knowledge, leaving you unforgettable in every room.

Admission is by application only. Cohort begins September 1st.

👉 Apply now to secure your place.

USA ELEGANCE TOUR

Cities:
Miami, FL: September 5 - 6
Boston, MA: September 26 - 28
Chicago, IL: October 3 - 5
Houston, TX: October 31 - Nov 2
Los Angeles, CA: November 7 - 9
San Francisco, CA: December 19 - 21

Olga’s Tips
Elegance Tip of the week

eleganceny

4M followers

View more on Instagram

Olga’s Recommendations
Becoming a Conversationalist

Those who have been following our exploration of meaningful conversation would have noticed me emphasizing the importance of genuine curiosity and thoughtful engagement. Developing sophisticated conversational skills becomes effortless when you learn from true masters. Emmy Award-winning actor Alan Alda's podcast explores how people connect, communicate and empathise.

https://open.spotify.com/show/1HuvoZlTCbfuX4MTEGpg6P

Saddle Up
Gallop and Gossip

The Hublot Polo Gold Cup in Gstaad becomes your training ground for meaningful conversation. This prestigious gathering creates natural opportunities to practice the art of dialogue. Whether discussing the finer points of polo strategy with fellow spectators or discovering common interests during breaks, these refined settings are the ideal environment to transform casual encounters into genuine connections.

21-24 August 2025

https://www.polo-gstaad.ch/

Game
The Elegance Game

In the following week, we will share the answer to this question. Click the answer that you think is right.